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The role of a Godly husband
(By Alexander Thomas)


When the sons of Zebedee were striving for positions of honor with Jesus, the Lord used the opportunity to teach a critical lesson about leadership. He said we should not be like the rulers of the Gentiles, who lord it over others. "Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many" (Matthew 20:26-28). Nobody is lower in position than a servant or a slave. So how does this apply to being the head of the home? It doesn't take away position, but it does describe responsibility. Every husband is subject to the needs of his wife and children, as the provider and the protector.

To be submissive to a leader who seems unable or unwilling to lead creates a great deal of anxiety for anyone, male or female. Being the head of the home is not a right to be demanded, it is an awesome responsibility.
Being the head of the home is not a right to be demanded, it is an awesome responsibility. Husbands will have to stand before God one day and give an account for what has been entrusted to them.

For a marriage to be successful, a man must leave those who were closest to him and cleave to his wife.

1. Headship / Covering / Leadership / Priest /Authority delegated by God - Eph 5:23-24
Set aside his own wisdom in order to use God's wisdom
Teach his wife to be submitted in her actions through Gods Word, and the choices she makes
Take the responsibility and right to instruct and correct her as a God given authority
A husband simply cannot meet all of his wife's needs. Only Christ can meet every essential need. That is why every husband should be the spiritual leader, and take whatever steps are necessary to ensure that Christ is the center of his life, his marriage and his family.

2. Oneness - Gen 2:24, 1 Corinthians 7:2-5; Eph 5:31
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh
Husbands priorities - God - Wife - children - then ministry or his work
Enjoy and Rejoice with his wife's body - Proverb 5:15-19
Protect them both from sexual temptations
Faithfulness to the wife.
Righteousness guards him whose way is blameless, But wickedness overthrows the sinner. Proverbs 13:6 (NKJV)

A good marriage is the union of two forgivers.

3. Love her with agape Love (self sacrificing)- Eph 5:25-33
Love your wife is a commandment of the Lord.
Love is a verb. It is an action, not a feeling it is something you choose to do.
Help her grow and mature in her walk with the Lord
Husband as the priest of the home teach her His Word
Not be bitter towards her, forgive her - Col 3:19
Motivate her to become more godly and encourage her, praise her
Have daily conversation with her about issues before they can become large problems.
Do not deprive one another - 1 Corinthians 7:5
God's instructions are so clear, husbands love your wife -Eph 5:25. How?
Just as Jesus loves you, and just as Jesus loves the Church.

4. Honor - Give honor to her - 1 Pet 3:7
Respect her as a gift and a treasure from God
Use good words towards her in agreement with the Bible
Ask for her opinions, ideas and her thoughts.
1 Corinthians 11:7 tells us the woman is the glory of the man. The word glory means reflection.

5. Provide for her and your children (financially, emotionally, spiritually)
Be the priest within your home - 1 Tim 5:8
Be responsible for her and the children
Know that what she wants is not always what she needs
Provide whatever is needed for her spiritual growth.
Every husband is subject to the needs of his wife and children, as the provider and the protector.

The mystery of marriage is that Jesus wants to be one with you, He loves you and wants to you to love Him. How? marriage will teach you, for it is an illustration of what you should be doing with the Lord in the Spirit. A marriage to be successful, a man must leave those who were closest to him and cleave to his wife.

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